We the people............

I'm adding to a  blurb I wrote almost 2 years ago, with November around the corner and the frustration I feel I wanted to post it again.  I'm very  proud to be a politically conservative woman, even more so when I talk to liberals because they don't make much sense to me.  It's ironic that alot of them hate the same things I do but yet they keep voting for the people who make those things happen. I just want to cock my head and ask them what in the hell they're thinking!  It feels like we're losing our Country and all it stands for, I know I'm not going to agree with everything the elected ones are doing or will do, but I would at the very least like to say I  respect them and trust them to have everyone's best interest at heart.  I'm tired of our leader blaming Bush, republicans, FOX...or anyone else who disagrees with him...man up and take some ownership...hear us and work for us...after all "WE...are the people."

We all listen, compare issues, characters, trustworthiness, and then debate with others who's going to be the best Politician….not the RIGHT one…the best.  We can argue politics til we’re blue in the face but in the end it all comes down to one thing, and that one thing is different for everyone. It may be healthcare, the war in Iraq, the economy, immigration, or gay marriage, it may be a number of things…there is always something that is dear to our heart for personal reasons. I've been told that the wise thing to do is to separate our heart from the big picture, I'm not sure that we should separate our heart stuff…our moral compass…our emotional being…from the big picture….I mean "We the people" are just that....people…and people are all about human emotions…right and wrong. We make judgment calls everyday…good choices, bad choices, but at the end of the day we are faced with what that day held for us…"We the people" We pay the consequences for our rightness or wrongness. We can let our heads lead us…let information lead us…let friends and family sway us…but in most cases, before we make a decision…before we even start to mull over the peaks and valleys of our choice…we already know the answer…I can't help but believe that if we all voted our conscience and forgot about the lesser of two evils…forgot about the big picture and focused on the here and now…the moment…the heart moment…we actually might end up with the right person in office. Face it, all the hoopla, the coverage, rallies and debates…it's all about being a politician, who can say the best thing the best way…with the right amount of confidence and conviction, who can turn things they've done or haven't done around to make themselves look better than they are….but we know who they are…we all know who they are.

My "in the end, dear to my heart for personal reasons" is the abortion issue, it‘s not my only issue and it‘s not my only important issue, but it is my moral compass issue. The majority of us "pro-lifers" know it isn't ideal to have congress decide what a woman can and cannot do with her own body…but the alternative is to keep killing more babies and that just isn’t something I’m okay with. I respect the choices of women…I just think that someone has to stand up…stand behind…fight for….the women who haven't been born yet. We’re all on the same page….we all want life….the only real difference is the women that are here now can voice their feelings, but the babies, the daughters, the little girls…(and of course all the little boys) who aren't here, need someone else to have a voice for them.

So what I’m saying is that even if Obama and his cronies started making sense…to me, I just can’t make myself vote for someone who cares more about an illegal immigrant than he does a defenseless baby. I want to live in a Country with a strong Christian at the helm…shoot me for being sooooo closed minded but that’s important to me and I believe it’s suppose to be.

Yoked

If you've been in both an unequally yoked relationship and a "yoked" one, (is that even a real word...lol)....you can feel how remarkable the difference is. I used to wonder if it really mattered all that much, I no longer wonder…believe me, it matters.


When you’re on the same page spiritually, you come together for all the right reasons. You’re not trading in the other good things, love, passion, zeal, comfort, friendship, you’re just more equipped to have a forever marriage. You tend to work on things differently, you put your faith into the same God so the understanding between the two of you is cosmic. You build a connection based on something solid, a foundation built on higher ground. You seek affirmations from the same source, you know when and how to lift your spouse up, when your spouse needs prayer, and you know how to pray for one another. You pray together, which is absolutely the closest thing two people can share, you’re bare in the most intimate way,

I believe there is more than one reason God calls for us to be equally yoked, not only because one can pull the other one away from God…I think it’s because He knows the strength your relationship will have if you both allow Him to guide it. He knows how victorious you will be as a couple. In this day, the day of divorce…more people need to be champions in their marriage. I found equally yoked…I really wanted it and I would have stayed alone if I couldn’t have found it. I owe finding the love of my life to God and I’m thankful beyond measure.

Peggy

I really miss Peggy.


She was a combination of both my friend and my Aunt. She was the only one in my family other than my grandfather who I connected with in a inspirational way. She loved God, had a personal relationship with Jesus and she loved babies. She married her high school sweetheart…the love of her life. She valued family and loved to cook, sew and play canasta. She lost her baby at 3 weeks old…she lost a piece of her already damaged heart. She had a love she needed and wanted to share so she adopted 4 children in the years that followed. She wanted to give each of them a new beginning, a life that stood out, something better...I believe she needed to save them...maybe because she couldn't save her own or maybe because loving them saved her. She was sick, she rarely felt good, she tired easily. She taught me things about marriage and forgiveness and during her last days she taught me about faith and strength. Some days I miss her so much my eyes well up with tears and it's hard to stop crying.

Her daughter is getting married next month…the same daughter who called me in tears when she was 11 and discovered she had her period…sobbing uncontrollably because she wanted her mom. I want to be at the wedding but it’s very far away and I can’t swing it….I almost feel like I’m letting Peggy down, I love her daughter like I love my own.

I really miss Peggy

"By his stripes we are healed" Isaiah 53:4-5

There’s this thing about me and sometimes it upsets people. I’m not afraid to speak up when my feelings or beliefs differ than someone else’s….standing my ground…even when I’m standing alone. I take ownership of what I’ve caused, I know what I need to work on and I know what I’ve worked on enough. I see beauty in odd things…there are more things I like about myself than I dislike…I’m learning to accept the differences in people… actually respecting and growing from those differences. The biggest thing I notice about myself is that I love people in a deeper more genuine way…seeing people for who they really are and wanting them to see the real me….as I grow older I don’t squander my time on people who treat me badly or talk behind my back…I just pray for them.


I had a conversation with someone today….we debated about a phrase, a metaphor, in my opinion “ a misleading interpretation”. I was reminded of a scenario a few years back where I stayed quiet a time I felt God wanted me to speak up. I had gone to a Bible Study with Lyndi, she asked me the week prior if I would go with her on Wednesday evenings. I didn’t hesitate. I’m careful about what Bible studies I attend because I’m particular about who’s teaching me, I knew there were going to be things the leader said I wasn’t going to agree with so I prepared myself to stay still and prayed that I would be given something to apply to my life during this hour and more importantly Lyndi would walk away with an even bigger hunger for God’s Word.

What I went home with was a lesson I will never forget. That night I prayed for a woman in the study who the leader said was dying from lung cancer….she looked very sick and weak. The woman listened to the leader tell us that she almost didn’t make it last week and how surprised they all were that she showed up because they all believed the Lord was going to take her home (now there’s some faithful believers!) She was pretty young…younger than me I think. That night I prayed God would help her find her faith and give her enough strength to receive her healing. I wanted to pray that out loud while I was there…it was engulfing me. I wanted to ask God to make them all shut up and start to pray in faith for this young mother….but I froze. I just sat there while she listened to the leader talk about how God tests us and puts trials in our paths to bring us closer to Him. I just sat there not doing anything to show her God is love and hope….to tell her that He’s done all He’s going to do and now it’s up to her to ask, believe and receive. I wanted to scream “By His stripes we are healed!“ Instead, I just sat there….not saying anything when the women in the group talked about how sometimes God punishes.….I quietly asked God to forgive me for just sitting there.

I remember walking downstairs to help Lyndi get Tucker out of his Bible class, the Bible class where he is suppose to learn one scripture a week. I walked in and he said…”Grandma….”God is love!”...(his first verse, learned)….I wanted to take him upstairs and say “Why are you teaching the little ones that God is love when you’re up here telling us that sometimes he causes cancer…he takes mommy’s away from children…he wants us to suffer pain and heartache…he wants us to be afraid…he wants us to lose our breath when we walk up a flight of stairs?” I wanted to say ‘ Why aren’t you teaching us that we reap what we sow, that smoking causes cancer, God doesn’t….so we shouldn’t smoke!!!!! I wanted to ask someone if it made any sense that a loving God would put his child in danger just to teach her faith and forgiveness…but I didn’t.

It’s not so much that I was judging these women…maybe they’re hearts were in the right place; however, I do think they are products of their pastors, Sunday school teachers and whoever else they’ve been listening to though.

I drove home with tears in my eyes and multitude of feelings….and then “POOF” I realized from that moment on I would always pray the way God wants me to pray. I heard my poppy’s words from years passed “Krissy, when you’re nudged to pray out loud and you don’t…it’s like telling God “no”. I finally understood what he meant.

So now when I hear something I disagree with concerning my God I don’t set out to try and change anyone; I will give my opinion and from there the best tool I have is to just show my life….my relationship with the Lord…..strong and forever growing. I’ll keep being who I’ve become, who I really am….the person God made.....the person God wants me to be….because I won’t just sit there and let someone slam my Savior

There are some for sure things I need God to tweak in me…things I struggle with…but I don’t beat myself up I remember where I used to be and where I am now and most important I see what my future holds when I stand firm for what I believe in…for who I believe in. I remembered what means most to me….God does….love does….people do….family and friends…I haven’t forgotten all the valleys…but I cling to the joy in my heart because of all of the peaks.

So….be careful who you allow to teach you God’s word…who prays for you…who you let guide you. If you’re confused you’re in the wrong place…..you wouldn’t go to a math class if they kept telling you 2 plus 2 equals 5 would you? I donLyndi stopped attending and I don’t know if that woman from Bible Study is still alive or not….what I do know is she didn’t leave very hopeful….she left ready to die.

Found this in my archives today...Mag turns 21 in 2 weeks.

Magen turned 18 yesterday…


I’ve been preparing myself for the feelings I’m going to experience when she graduates this school year…being the youngest of my three, that whole empty nester thing lands on her shoulders, something I know will be bittersweet. What I didn’t prepare myself for tho' was how I would feel the day she turned 18.  I was consumed with an array of feelings yesterday….from crabbiness to awe.

There were even moments when my eyes would begin to fill up with tears and I would have to turn away from whoever I was talking with,  I know it sounds so silly… I was so not ready for these feelings.

We spent the whole evening together….all of us…and I just kept thinking about how proud I am of my children….how they make me feel like I've done something right.  I don't just love them, I really like them, I enjoy them and I'm proud of who they are.  They actually carry some of the traits I tried to instill in them...all the eye rolling, sighs, huffs and puffs...all the times they bucked me or argued with me, all the times I thought they weren't listening to me, come to find out....they were.….Amazing.

Next spring brings so many new and uncharted paths for Magen…but also for me, it’s been just Mag and I for the last few years and I see her becoming more independent by the day.  It’s a good thing, I know….but sometimes good can be swirled with sad…like a twist cone.  Does that make sense…nope, probably not.

Magen…hmmm,

“She fancies dirt bikes and wrestlers. She owns the property where obedience and judgment calls reside. Her humor is dry but her character swims full force through white caps and singing whales.”

This is my Magen...my Magbag.